New Adventure

This is a first for me.  I am going to enter a design challenge call.  This is where a stamp company sends out a request for people to submit their work and if they are picked, they will get to be a guest designer for that company.  I am nervous but am going to do it anyway.  Let's see what happens.  I have to submit three different cards, so here they are:

This card is called "Dream".  I used and Eiffel Tower stamp from Studio G to do the background.  I stamped the towers in two different shades of brown.  I also used a cancelled postal stamp.  I used Vintage Photo Distress Ink to ink the edges.  The DP is from the DCWV Heritage collections.  I tied a deep chocolate grograin ribbon around the middle and matted the focal image on Chocolate Chip SU Cardstock.

This one is a "Tattoo and Teapots" card.  I downloaded an image sheet of tattoos and colored them in using alcohol ink markers.  I used Worn Lipstick Distress ink for the edges.  The title is a tattoo font from my computer matted on black cardstock and pop dotted up for dimension.



This card is made with a cute stamped angel.  I used alcohol ink markers to color in the image after stamping it with Staz-On in black.  I matted on a medium blue cardstock.  The rhinestones are from Recollections.  I sponged a cloud design on the card base itself.  The ribbon is from AC Moore.



This is a card I made for a challenge on Teapot Tuesdays on SCS.  I hand drew the Morse Code panel and the King is from DCWV Heritage stack.  The pig is from a Gina K Designs collection and the boom box is a Recollections stamp.  I used Vintage Photo ink to age all edges. 

Praying for Your Husband

I have begun reading Stormie Omartian's book,"The Power of a Praying Wife".  Wow, what an eye opener.  I am understanding how my attitude toward my husband needs to change.  Loving your spouse is not enough.  You must also respect your husband and support him. 

Here are some of the things I have learned:

The strength of a man and wife joined together in God's sight is far greater than the sum of the strengths of each person.  That's because the Holy Spirit unites them and gives added power to their prayers.

If you pray for yourself and not for him, you will never find the blessings and fulfillment you want.  What happens to him happens to you and you can't get around it.  This oneness gives us a power that the enemy doesn't like.  That's why he devises ways to weaken it. He gives us whatever we will fall for, whether it be low self esteem, pride, the need to be right, miscommunication, or the bowing to our own selfish desires.  He will tell you likes.  He will tell you whatever you will believe because he knows if he can get you to believe it, there is no future for your marriage.

When we are frustrated and angry in our marriage, we see things the way we want to, not from God's perspective.  When we are miserable in our marriage we feel anything will be an improvement over what we are experiencing, but we don't see the whole picture.  We don't see what God wants it become.

Praying for your husband will be an act of unselfish, unconditional love and sacrifice on your part.  You must be willing to make this commitment knowing it is quite possible that he will never pray for you in the same way.  In some cases, he may not pray at all.  Whether he does or he doesn't is not your concern, it's God's.

Your happiness and fulfillment will not ride upon whether he prays, it will depend on your own relationship with the Lord.

The purpose of praying for your husband is to ask God to make your heart right, show you how to be a good wife, share the burdens of your soul, and seek God's blessings on your husband.

Look to God as the source of all you want to see happen in your marriage, and don't worry about how it will happen.  It's your responsibility to pray.  It's God's job to answer.  Leave it in His hands.

So these things are just from the introduction to the book.  I haven't even delved into Chapter One.  Just wait...

Trusting in the Lord

I have discovered that learning a lesson that God has been trying to teach you is much easier learned the first time rather than the 4th, 5th, 16th..time.  Learning a lesson you should have learned years ago is very painful and humbling.  Coming face to face with the consequences of your actions is an eye opener to say the least. 

When you have allowed your self centeredness, selfish pride to rule your life for so long, it's a shocker when you come to the bottom and have only one alternative.  GOD!!

But, thankfully we have God's grace and mercy and forgiveness.  Those three things can see us through any trial we have to go through.  Thank God.

I am such a bad blogger.  I see other's blogs and wonder where they find the time.  I always start the day with the best of intentions of writing on here, but time just seems to slip away.  Between Kierstynne's lessons, fixing lunch, getting Tim off to work, housework and just everyday life, there doesn't seem to be enough hours of the day.

These last few weeks have been very interesting.  Since March 3rd, my life has been turned around.  I am learning and seeing things that I never thought possible.  God has been so good to me.  He is revealing things to me from my past that I thought I had dealt with, but were holding me in bondage.  He has been showing me how my prideful, self centered attitude was destroying my life.  It's been a hard lesson to learn.  I have come to the conclusion that it is much easier to learn the lesson the first or second time around than to be stubborn and not learn until time 15 or 16.  The lesson is much harder because more time has past and you become more entangled in the deception.  Thank God we have a God who is infinitely patient with us and doesn't give up on us.

I know that right now, I am in the valley.  It is hard making my way through.  There are boulders, snares, and learning opportunities.  The Word tells me that even though I walk through the valley that I do not have to fear because God is with me.  Sometimes I still think it would be easier to go another way, but that way leads to death and destruction.  Yes, it is easier, but no where near as rewarding.  Learning how to depend completely on God has been hard at times, but it is also enlightening.  I have also realized that when I finally make it to the top of the mountain, I will be able to look back and see how far I have come and I will be able to see God's footprints right beside mine, showing that He never left me while I was making my way through the valley.  Praise God!!!  I am not alone.  Even when I feel alone, I am not alone.  God is always right there beside me, urging me on, encouraging me, helping me press on to the top of the mountain.

God has also shown me that I am not who my past said I was going to be.   I do not have to be held in bondage because of my past.  God has set me free from the generational curses that stem from my past.  I have a choice..I can stay in bondage or I can choose to walk in the freedom of God.  I choose freedom.  We have the ability to curse with our words.  Not curse like a sailor, but curse as in bondage.  What we allow to come out of our mouths can either cause damage or encourage.  When we speak about a person, we can choose to speak forth blessings or curses.  When someone hurts our feelings or says something that cause anger to well up inside us, we can choose to say, "God, forgive them, because they don't know what they are saying", or we can say, "Dang that person.  He/she is an idiot."  Which do you think would be the right choice.  I know that it is hard to choose the way Jesus would take, but it's the right way.

 Now, I have to warn you.  When I began to notice changes in my life after March 3rd, I was on cloud 9 for about 3 weeks.  Then, slyly, discreetly, the devil moved in.  I began to read the book, "The Power of a Praying Wife," and to do the study guide that goes along with it.  I was reading the Word everyday, and doing another study about humility and seeking God.  Within 2 days of beginning the Praying Wife book, Tim and I were arguing over stupid stuff.  He got mad at me and I didn't even know what I had done..so I got mad at him for getting mad at me.  Sounds rather childish right?  Well, that's how the enemy of our souls work.  He doesn't come right out and say, "Look, I am going to cause havoc in your life today.  Just sit back and watch what I am going to do."  No.  It's sneaky, it's sly and it can be very damaging.  He comes like a thief, seeking to see who and what he can destroy.  Marriage is ordained by God and it is the first thing the devil will attack.  When it dawned on my lightening fast pea brain what was happening, I was able to mount a counter attack.  I prayed and asked for help.  I knew I couldn't change Tim's anger so I asked God to do it.  Two days later, I found out what had made him get mad at me and it was something that he thought I had done that I hadn't actually done.  So we were able to work it out.   The more I draw closer to God, the harder the devil is going to fight against me.  I know that God has a plan for me and my husband and it is going to knock that stupid devil for a loop and he is trying to destroy us before we can even get started walking out the plan God has for us.  Not going to happen..We have to be aware of his schemes at all times.  The Bible tells us that he sneaks about like a lion just seeking out those he can devour and destroy.  We have to be on our guard at all times, making sure we have put on the Armor of God everyday in order to defeat him.

As we walk out God's plan for us every day, we must make sure we are ready and able to fight against our enemy.  We must make sure we are well prepared.  How do we do that?  We spend time with God each day.  We must pray without ceasing.  That doesn't mean we have to into our prayer closets and spend the day.  It just means that we are in a continuous conversation with God all day.  We must read the Word each day.  Get the Word into your memory and your spirit so that when you need a flaming arrow, you know what to use.  We must allow the Holy Spirit to live large in us.  We must decrease so that Jesus can increase.  The more of the Spirit we have living in us, the better we are able to defend against the devil.  In times of trouble, when we are in a place where we are stuck, the Holy Spirit can step up to the front line and defend us.  If we don't allow Him to have that much leeway, we are going to be attacked and beaten down.  Don't allow that to happen.  Fill yourself up every morning. 

I pray a special blessing upon each person that reads my blog today.  May the Spirit of God live largely in your life.  May God lead, guide and direct your path.  May you feel God's arms supporting you, encouraging you, and loving you throughout this day.  God bless  you.

Wonderful Weekend

We had such a wonderful evening on Friday.  We travelled down to Hershey, Pa for the Casting Crowns concert.  It was so nice to have time to spend with adults.  After being with my wonderful daughter all the time...24/7..it's nice to get away and spend some time having adult conversations and relaxing.

Tim drove down and tried to give his mother a heart attack.  Tim has a bad habit of tailgating.  He will wait until the last minute to hit the brakes and even though I have learned not to say anything, but to sit on the passenger side and pray, my poor MIL was a nervous wreck.  She even tried to lay down in the back seat so she couldn't see..LOL.  Finally, Tim decided to give his mom a break and stop tailgating.  Needless to say, I drove home..:)

We arrived in Hershey about 6pm and met up with Pastor Jim and Dorothy and Mohammed and Jennifer Alsafar.  We were planning on a nice dinner at Applebee's but the the wait was 45 minutes so we opted for KFC.  Suprisingly, it was really good.  I love their mashed potatoes anyway, so it was all good.  The conversation made it even better. 

The concert was fantastic.  There were a couple of new groups that I hadn't heard before.  Lindsay McCaul, Royal Tailors and Matthew West.  I was really digging Matthew West.  He had some really powerful songs and his humor was great.  Royal Tailors were pretty good too.  I'm not sure what I would classify their group as, but probably alternative.  Pretty good though.  Lindsay McCaul was good and kind of folksy.  I was very impressed with what a great show Casting Crowns put on.  It was great. 

The best part of the evening was knowing that I was in an arena full of people who believed the same things as I do.  It was great to have liked minded people all gathered in one place with the intent of worship.  Wonderful it was.  It was like a small glimpse of what Heaven may be like.  Hundreds of people all gathered together with the same purpose. 

The ride home was hysterical.  My MIL was tired, as  it was after 11pm before we left the Hershey area....well past her bedtime.  She started singing kid's nursery rhymes.  Tim wanted out of the car.  We didn't get all the words right which made it even funnier.  Yeah, it was a fun ride home. 

Home at 2am and back up at 10am to go to the church for the kid's Easter Egg Hunt.  The kids had a great time and we hid over 200 eggs for them.  They got to do a craft, have lunch and the puppets even showed up to teach a lesson about what Easter is really all about.  I think everyone had a great time.  I know I did.

It is now 3pm and I need a nap....

Revival

When you think of revival, what do you think of?  A big tent set up with a special evangelist who comes in for a week?  Watching people be hit by the Holy Spirit?  Feeling caught up in the moment but then let down after the week? 

Many people have the same views of revival.  I have been doing a study called Seeking Him.  It has been very interesting.  Revival, as defined in this study, is a personal thing.  It happens inside your heart.  Revival begins with you and me.  Revival is God's way of rekindling the fire that was in your heart, but has grown cold.  You don't need a big tent, an evangelist or lots of music.  Spending time with God, in His word, in prayer and in quiet time can cause revival to happen inside you.

Sometimes, God uses these preconceived notions of revival to cause revival in your heart.  But after the emotions of the moment are gone, you can still experience revival continually.  Revival is a state of mind not a feeling of euphoria.  The feelings fade.  You are not going to "feel" those euphoric feelings all the time.  Faith isn't based on feelings and neither is revival.

I have been in the midst of a revival for 4 weeks now and it has been the most amazing adventure.  Some of the tears have stopped, but the feelings of being loved haven't.  I haven't been in tent meetings, we haven't had an evangelist for the past four weeks, and the music has been from cds, not bands.  The revival I have been experiencing has been an inward change.  A renewing of my heart and mind.  A recharging if you will.  It has been an awesome ride and I look forward to seeing what God is going to do next.

Do you want to experience this revival?  All you need to do is begin spending time with God.  Delve into His Word.  Pray with an earnest heart and sit quietly in God's presence.  These are the beginnings of having a personal revival.  Try it, you might find that revival of your heart is just what you need.

3 Weeks and Counting

Well, it has been three weeks since my close encounter of the God kind.  It has been an amazing three weeks.  School with Kierstynne has been great.  She moved into 3rd grade math today.  She is breezing through.  I am so proud of her.  We haven't had any melt downs, frustrations, or yelling.  I have come to the realization that most of it was my fault.  I didn't realize that my attitude had been so bad, but, well, I realize it now.  Now that my attitude has changed, Kierstynne has changed.  She is still a typical 7 year old girl with emotional issues..lol, but school wise, it's much better.

I am really enjoying the Max Lucado bible study I am doing.  It is very interesting and  I am learning alot.  My Bible reading is going well too.

Stay tuned for more updates about how awesome God is....

God's House

The last two weeks have been unbelievable.  It's hard to put into words what it has been like.  I think the easiest way to explain it is that it has been like being in a coma for 20 years and waking up to discover how much of the world around you has changed.  I am discovering new things daily.

 After my close encounter with God on March 4th, I knew God had done something amazing, but the fleshly, carnal part of me was still in doubt a little.  I had an experience that made me realize that what I was experiencing was truly a miraculous work of God.  I was asked to help someone out, to take a backseat and not be in charge.  Now, the old Emily would have balked at that.  The old me would have literally gotten sick to her stomach at the thought of not being in control and in charge.  Guess what???  It didn't faze me.  I felt nothing in my stomach.  I did what was asked of me without even as much as a flinch of the old me.  AMAZING!!!!  It didn't dawn on my lightening fast mind right at that point.  It was later on during worship that I realized what had happened.  I couldn't believe it.  I  knew right then that God had truly changed me.  He had gone in and taken out the old Emily and replaced her with someone fantastic.  The new Emily is still all awonder and the way that she sees the world.

I feel like someone who is going through AA.  There are steps that God is having me take to rebuilt relationships and bridges that I destroyed in my selfishness.  I have gone and apologized to my MIL and to my husband for things that I should never have done.  I was scared.  I won't lie about that.  Having to humble yourself and admit your mistakes is a scary thing, but has such amazing outcomes.  I am slowly rebuilding the things that I destroyed.  I know that it won't be easy.  But nothing good comes easy right?

I began a Bible study by Max Lucado the other night about Embracing God and drawing closer to Him.  The first two lessons are on God's House.  When we pray, we enter into God's dwelling place.  God wants to converse and commune with us.  In our prayer time, we get to experience God's environment.  What a wonderful thought. 

One of the questions that Max asked was,  "If God's house was in your neighborhood, what would it look like?"  Good question.  I thought about it and came up with this answer.  I believe that if God's house was here in Ransom, PA, it would be a most unassuming house.  No grandure.  Even though God is the God of the universe, he isn't presumptuous.  He isn't grandiose.  I think the house would be like many of the other houses here in town.  The outside would be nice, but nothing spectacular.  When you look upon it, you would feel  welcome.  There would be an overwhelming urge to enter into this house.  I think there would be beautiful gardens surrounding the house with lots of wildlife running through the yard.  You have the choice as to enter or not.  No one will make you enter God's house.  But, the amazing thing is that when you do chose to enter the house, it will take your breathe away.  The inside is where you will find the opulance of God's majesty.  Inside the house is where you find the splendor of the King of Kings and Lord of Lords.  But until you enter God's house you will never know. 

Would you willingly enter into that house?  Would you want to discover what is on the outside of that normal looking house?  Do you desire to see what is inside a house that looks so unassuming?  I did...try it, you might be surprised at what you find.

Close Encounters of the God Kind

Sunday was an amazing day in the House of the LORD.  Never have I experienced a move of the Holy Spirit as I did on Sunday.  It was indescribable.  It was incredible.  It was AWESOME!!  Something changed in me that day.  The connection between my head and my heart was finally established.

For years I have had head knowledge.  Not just of who God is, but of the Word of God.  From the time I was a child, I have learned Scripture.  I have an innate ability to learn.  Not just of the Bible, but everything.  I thirst for knowledge.  I love to read and to learn about everything.  But, for some reason, being able to put that Biblical knowledge into practice has been just  out of my reach.  I believe that experiences from my childhood prevented me from truly believing that the promises in God's Word were for me.  I had no problem believing in healing and restoration for others.  I knew that God could and did reach down and touch people.  I just never believed it was for me.

Being emotionally and mentally abused as a child and teen, I believed myself unloveable.  Unworthy.  Why would God take time with me when there were so many others who needed Him?  Sunday morning, God made me realize that I worthy.  That every promise spoken in His Word is for me.  God took time to come personally to me and let me know that He loves me.  Never before had I felt such emotion.  From the minute the hands were laid on me, the heat of the Holy Spirit overwhelmed me.  As the tears began to flow, the dam broke.  The wall between my head and my heart crumbled.   Using a simple man, one who was willing to be a vessel, God was able to reach out to me and make me understand that He LOVES me.  What an amazing concept.

I am not what has been spoken over me for years.  I am worthy, useful, compassionate, valued, my life has meaning.  I do not have to stay in the place of lack.  I can rise above my past and the curses spoken against me.  Thank You Lord.  God called me a warrior.  Yes, I am a warrior.  I am more than capable of standing up for God.   God called me beautiful.  Yes, I am beautiful.  My emotions have nothing to do with fact. 

Before I was spoken over, I was sitting in the pew praying for God to make me as nice looking on the inside as I was on the outside Sunday morning.  I had a new outfit and a new hairdo and felt pretty.  I didn't feel so pretty on the inside.  I have allowed my past to have too much influence over my present.  I have done things that have hurt me as well as my family.  I had learned to put up a great facade.   So, as I sat there praying, God touched me.  He made my inside as pretty as my outside.  I AM a new creature.  The old things have passed away and all things have become new.  I feel different.  I have prayed lots of times for change, but something different happened this time.  I am more compasssionate, more caring, calmer.  I still have some things that God and I have to work on together, but I know now that He cares and He will continue the good work that He has started in me until the day of Christ.

I was reading about the sinful woman in Luke tonight.  With new eyes I realized things that I had missed before.  This woman, who chose to live in sin, came to realization that she was a sinner.  Being a prostitute was probably one of the worst things you could have done in that time.  Everyone looked down on her and treated her like a pariah.  She, I'm sure, worked hard for everything that she had.  One of the things that struck me was that without men who used her, she wouldn't have had a job.  That's right.  The same men who talked about her and treated her so horribly in the daytime where the same men who came  to visit her at night.  That's right.  These two faced men keep her in her profession.  The second thing that I realized was that the alabaster box full of perfume was what she used to entice the men.  It smelled good.  It made her smell good.  She spent her hard earned money, and probably alot of it, to buy this box of perfume to aid her in her job.  Her hair would have been an aid also.  Keeping her hair beautiful would have been an asset to her.  The third thing I realized was the she felt unworthy, unloved and lower than trailer park trash.  She wouldn't even look upon Jesus' face.  She stayed bowed down at His feet like a dog. 

This woman took the two things most valueable to her and used them to honor Jesus.  She poured out her expensive perfume upon His feet.  She didn't feel worthy enough to anoint His head.  She used her hair, her crowning glory, to wipe the tears from His feet.  The two things most important to her profession she didn't think twice of using to honor the Lord.  She realized her need for a Savior and knew that Jesus was that Savior.  She never had to speak a word outloud.  Jesus looked into her heart.  Everything He needed to know was right there in her heart.  She repented on the floor at Jesus' feet.

Today, unfortunately, many people don't realize their need for a Savior.  They don't want to use their prized possessions to honor the Lord.  They are content to live their lives to please themselves.  The more stuff they can attain, the happier they think they are.  How mistaken they are.  They need a Close Encounter of the God Kind.

What do you have that you prize above all?  Are you willing to pour it out at Jesus' feet in honor?  Are you willing to be transparent before God?  I was like that Sinner Woman.  Not a prostitue, but a sinner.  I put myself above everything.  I have done things because of this that have some repricussions that I now have to deal with.  I put what I wanted above what God wants for me.   I have hurt others and burned bridges that should never have been burned.  I have made myself untrustworthy because of my actions.  But, by the Grace of God, I am being restored.  I am being remade.  I am more!!

Are you willing to lay your most prized possessions down?

Powerful Message

I absolutely love my pastor.  I learn so much from him every sermon he preaches/teaches.  I love the fact that he doesn't talk down to you or talk at you.  His messages are chocked full of good little bits of information that more than not, hit home.

This Sunday, alot of what he said made complete sense and smacked me right between the eyes.

If you think that getting out of debt and having a bigger bank account will be the answer to happiness, you're wrong.  Getting out of debt is a good thing, but your happiness comes from God not money.

Our wealth is not measured by our bank account.  In order to be a wealthy person, read your Word daily and apply what you read to your life.

Just because you are getting older doesn't mean you are getting smarter.  Your "smartness" comes from reading and applying the Word.

We should not value our things above people.  There is nothing we have that should be so important that we wouldn't be willing to give it away.

Sometimes we are too tired or "sick" to go to church, but never too sick or tired to something we really want to do.

We have all heard the saying.."The grass is always greener on the other side."  Could it be that there just happens to be more "fertilizer" on that side.  We must learn to be content in where God has placed us in this season of our lives.  Contentment comes from being comfortable with what God has given us.  It's up to us whether we are going to live a contented life or not.

These are just a few of the little nuggets I picked up from my pastor on Sunday.

Resolutions

Every year, I make resolutions.  Every year come February, I break them.  So this year, I have decided not to make resolutions, but to make decisions.  Decisions that I will stand by throughout the year.  Decisions that will benefit me, that will enable me to become a better person, and that will bring me further in my walk with the Lord.

I will read the Word everyday.  Even if it is only 1 verse.  I will read it. 
I will pray every day.  Even if it is while I am folding laundry, washing dishes, or just sitting still.
I will strive to be a better wife.  Even if it means doing something I really don't like.
I will strive to be a better mother.  Even if that means playing with Play-doh or watching Drake and Josh.
I will strive to be a better friend.  Even if that means hearing the same story again and again and giving the same advice again and again.
I will not think of myself as much.  Even if that means no more scrapbooking supplies for a while.
I will get out of debt.  Even if that means not going to the movies or out to eat as much.

These are things that I have decided to do to make my life better.  These are decisions that I can stick to.  These are not resolutions that can be broken.  These are decisions that I have purposed in my heart to uphold.

21 Day Facebook Fast

So, it has been 24 days and last night, day 23, I went on FB for the first time since I began to fast it.  I played a couple games, caught up on some news, wished a few ppl HB and signed out.  I was a total of 1 hour.  Not bad.  You know, I have come to the conclusion that I really didn't miss it. 

While fasting FB, I was able to do 14 scrapbook layouts, make about 80 cards for three swaps, organize pictures, and even do a little housework.  I spent more time with Kierstynne and Tim.  I also spent time reading the Word and praying, which was the main goal of this whole fasting thing.  It has actually been good not being on FB. 

I will continue to catch up on the news, play a few games and such, but I have made it a point to only spend 2 hours max a day on FB.  I am determined to stick to it.

Favorite Christmas Memory

I want to hear from you.  Please leave a comment and let me know your most favorite Christmas memory.  We all have them, some are full of joy, some are full of sorrow, but we all have them.  Leave yours here.

My favorite Christmas memory is the year Kierstynne was 15 months old.  She was so cute opening up her presents.  She wasn't sure what to do exactly, but she tore into them like crazy.  I think she would have been just as happy with the paper and the boxes as she was the present inside.  There was paper everywhere.  She took the bows and stuck them to her head, her clothes, her legs and when she couldn't find anymore space on herself, she started sticking them to me and her dad.  She was so full of joy.  Her eyes were full of sparkle.  Her face was lit up like the tree.  She wasn't old enough to give me a list a mile long.  She didn't understand materialism.  She was excited over everything she opened.  Even the clothes.  I will never forget that Christmas.

Now, tell me yours.

Such a bad blogger

It's so pathetic.  I am such a bad blogger.  I had great intentions when I started this blog.  I was going to write everyday, even if it wasn't anything major.  Yeah, that hasn't happened.  But, with the Christmas season coming up and Thanksgiving just behind us, I find myself in a funk.  This time of year is very hard for me.  This year it will be 14 years since Jimmy was killed, and even after all this time, I still get funky.  I don't even realize it is creeping up on me until WHAM!! depression starts in, feelings of sadness, worthlessness, small panic attacks.  I know that God has healed me of these things back in Augus/September, but they still try and creep in.    It doesn't help that I just turned 39 on Sunday.  Wow..39.  I remember when I thought that was so old.  LOL.  Now, I think, mmm...not so old.  I am still pretty young.  I have a lot of life to live yet.  Although some mornings I think my body would disagree.  It creeks, cracks, moans and groans and that is before I even get out of bed.  It takes me about an hour to get the old girl warmed up and primed so that we can move around without creeking, cracking and popping.  I remember years back when I could just hop out of bed, throw my clothes on and be out the door.  Now, not so much.   Wait, who am I kidding...not at all. 

I was reading all my friends post this past month about things they were thankful for.  It was nice to see that people still remember what the holidays are all about.  I just can't believe how commercialized this time of year has gotten.  Before Halloween was even over, there were some stores that had Christmas stuff out already.  Now, don't get me wrong.  I like Christmas.  I love to go look at lights, make Christmas cookies, and I even like to listen to Christmas music.  But come on, November 1st?  I do not want to start celebrating Christmas before I even celebrate Thanksgiving.  Let me get my fill of turkey, dressing, cranberry sauce, pumpkin pie, etc before I start thinking about making Christmas cookies, listening to the carols and buying gifts. 

I wish I were more like those who start in January buying for the next Christmas.  I am a December shopper all the way.  Most of the time, I buy about 2 weeks before Christmas.  That gives me just enough time to get everything wrapped.  This year is going to be a gift card year.  It is so much easier.  They won't return it, it's the right size and color.  :).  Although, I did buy Kierstynne two presents when we went on our Ladie's Retreat in November, I usally wait.

I am making a New Year's Resolution this year.  I am going to post something everyday on here.  Even if it's just  a short prayer.  Maybe a picture, a thought, something.  I want to have a record of my thoughts for a whole year.  I want to see how much I grow in the Lord as well as how my life changes over a year.  I have a feeling my life as I know it is about to change.  We'll see..

What do we really need?

In my last post, I talked about the things we need verses the things we want.  Here's alittle more of my thoughts on that.

As I sit and write this, my brain is whirling a hundred miles an hour.  What are my needs?  How do I learn the difference between what I think I need and what I truly need?  What about what I want?  Well, let's see if we can figure it out.

We, as human beings, have some basic needs.  We need food to make our bodies work.  Yes, food is a good thing.  I may not always have exactly what I want to eat all the time, like a nice, thick, juicy T-Bone steak with a loaded baked potatoe and a salad, but I have food to keep my body running.  The way God designed our bodies is amazing to me.  He knew exactly how much of each nutrient we would need, how much oxygen, carbon dioxide, nitrogen, hydrogen, etc that it would take to make our bodies function.  If one little thing is out of whack, it throws the rest of our body off track.  I have diabetes and my thyroid doesn't work right, so my body is so out of whack.  But, we must still feed it for it to be able to function.  We also need water to keep us hydrated.  You can go up to a month without eating and still be ok, but after 3 days of no water, your body will shut down.  It can't function.  Jesus says that if we come to Him, He will give us Living Water.  Water that is so much better than what we need to survive. 

We need shelter.  A home.  A roof over our heads.  That doesn't mean we must have a million dollar home.  I guess it would be nice to have a great big ol' house with lots of space, but think about all the dusting you would have to do.  :).  Our shelter, no matter what size, can be beautiful.  We must take care of the the shelter God gives us.  My house is old.  It needs alot of work, but God blessed us with this house.  We have no mortgage.  It's a blessing.

We need clothing.  Yes, not many people would want to see  me running around naked.  It might blind them.  But, I don't have to have clothes that cost as much as a car payment.  My jeans are old, but they fit and cover me up.  I still have shirts that I had before Kierstynne was born.  When I met Tim, I had 84 pair of shoes.  Now I have 4.  I don't need designer clothing.  I just NEED clothing to cover me up, keep me warm, and look nice.  God blessed me in this area too.  My aunt lost almost 100 pounds and gave me all of the stuff she couldn't wear anymore.  8 bags of clothes to be exact.  So, now I have nice things to wear to church and around the house.  I don't need to have thousand dollar shoes and a purse to match them.  God has given me what I need.

We need a car.  In today's world, you really can't get anywhere without one.  I would love to have a new 2012 Chevrolet Camaro.  Have you seen them?  They are beautiful.  I WANT one.  Do I NEED one?  Nope.  We have a Trailblazer that sometimes needs a little help but it gets us where we are going and back.  It gets me to the store to buy the food we need, it get's us to church for the Living Water, and it runs.  That's all we NEED from a car.   Sometimes, our cars frustrated us, like when mine sprung a leak, but God fixes that too.  He sent my cousin up here to fix it.  Would I like to have a beautiful, shiny, brand new, straight off the showroom floor Camaro.  You betcha.  Do I need it?  Nope.

We need jobs.  In order to survive in this economy, we need to work.  I have been blessed to be able to stay home and homeschool Kierstynne.  That is my job.  I am a mother, wife, housekeeper, taxi driver, laundry maid, cook, accountant, planner, and a repairman.  I have many jobs, but don't earn any money.  Tim works and works hard.  He brings in the money that we survive on.  Does he NEED his job?  Yes.  Does he have the job he really WANTS? No.  God has provided a good job with medical benefits and a decent hourly wage.  It could be better, but it could be alot worse.  God, in His Word, tells us we need to be good stewards with what we have.  If He can't trust us with a little, how can He trust us with alot?  I admit that I am not a very good steward.  Sometimes I let my wanting get me in trouble.  I have really been trying to do much better and slowly I am learning.  If Tim had the job he really wants, to be a Christian Artist, singing for God on the road, we wouldn't have much time with him.  He would be gone alot.  There would be more money coming in, but at what cost?  What would we have to give up in order to have more money?  God knows the plans He has for Tim and if it means singing, that's awesome.  If not, that's ok too. 

We need family and friends.  God never meant for us to be alone.  He devised marriage and family so that we wouldn't be alone.  God knew exactly what He was doing when He picked the family you would be born into.  We may not always like that family and sometimes even wonder why He picked it, but He sees the big picture where we only get a snapshot.  There was a rhyme and a reason for why God put you in the family you are in.  God also places our friends in our lives for a reason.  Some friends only stay for a season.  They teach us something.  Some friends stay around for years and years and become like family.  I have a couple of those kinds of friends and I wouldn't trade them for anything.  We NEED people to communicate with, to share our feelings with, to share our good times and our bad.  We need our family and friends to support and encourage us, to lift us up, to help guide us.  We may want to have a different family, or different friends, but we do need them.

So, I am slowly learning about the things we need.  I have realized that I NEED a relationship with Jesus.  I NEED to listen to His voice.  I NEED to read my Bible everyday.  I NEED a strong and consistant prayer life.  I NEED God's grace and mercy.  But, I also NEED to WANT these things.  These are wants that are profitable for me.  Wanting more money, a bigger house, nicer clothes, a shiny new car, and more stuff are not wants that are profitable for me.

Help me Lord to learn to WANT things that are going to help me in my walk with You.  Teach me about the things You want me to want.  Guide me, lead me, and show me the path You have laid out for me.  Thank You God.